Tuesday, November 7, 2017

A COMPANY THAT SHOULD PICK A FUCKING NAME AND STICK WITH IT PRESENTS: TNA: BOUND FOR GLORY 2017: A BIG PILE OF SHED!

Seriously, THIS! Building you pick as the venue for the last show of the year?
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look at it! That looks like a shopping centre the Rich People USE to shop in! Oh it's up there with all the legendary venues!
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Madison Square Garden,
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Wembley Stadium,
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Your Grandad's Shed!

That is where we stand!

Alberto El Patron had a run in with Jeremy Borash on the pre-show, basically boiling down to...
AEP"Why haven't anyone called me during my injury? is it because I am a woman beating scumbag?"
JB: "ERRR...YEAH! AND YOU POINT IS...WHAT?"

The ppv started with a 6 man x division match, under "lucha Rules"- 2 men in at any time. can be tagged out and if they leave the ring, 2 others become "legal" and it's one fall to a finish. it seems hard to pick up, but it made for some good storytelling, With Trevor throwing out Petey Williams after hitting Canadian Destroyer in his return to His home stat...PROVINCE Of Ontario (LOL #FOREIGNERPROBLEMS, Hipster Ninja!)

Due to the Problems with Taya's Passport (In a Nutshell, Taya has dual Citizenship and tna is too broke to pay for any red tape they might encounter!) we had A replacement match Tyson Dux vs Ichimori, Unfortunately, Tna released their Version of a Gobshite with a Beachball, A Drunk Laurel Van Ness into the crowd. It just made it look like that tna give no fucks about non-talent, especially non-talent who were gracious enough to drop their own schedules to be here! Ishimori Won, but cameramen were to busy filming Lauren to record the finish!

After the break, we returned to the Monster's Ball already in progress. Looks like Lauren had a reason to be here, and it was to attack Grado for jilting her. Rosemary equalized but it wasn't enough! Grado is to be "deported" in the next set of tapings!

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TEAM TNA VS TEAM AAA IN A NUTSHELL
Sami Callahan has debuted has the enforcer for OVERRATED VAPID EVERYTHING in the 5150 street fight! Ove, who have seemingly turned heel, is still the tna tag team champions!

Dressed in  ring gear that was similar to the one she wore this night 10 years ago when she became the 1st Knockout's champion, Gail ended her Career on a high, winning the title 10 years later against Allie and Sienna

After the high, the big downer, 1st, the Dude Bros of American FLOP Team ruined the the cage match, and Alberto tried to the prove he isn't a bitch by beating up men from behind for change, ending the biggest main event of the year...as a no contest!

WELL 2017, THAT IT FOR YOU!
Thank you all for your views this year, But as for now! EnlightenedTowers is on it's Christmas Hiatus til the  fourth of January! You can still drop me a line on Twitter @RealEnli, but until I lock that up my only other review this year will be the xmas special over at Bogger Box Office!

SEE YOU ALL IN 2018!
PEACE
X
EAMONN
AKA
ENLI.

Friday, November 3, 2017

Bound for glory 2017 predictions (WARNING: CONTAINS *SPOILERS*)

2 Days away (or 3 of you are in Britain!) from Bound for glory and i have some predictions of the last ppv i do this year! I know that tonight (Friday 3/11/17) is that day of impact's showing in Britain and Ireland, so if you don't want to to read the spoilers coming out of this week's episode: well, you know where the backspace button is!

(ALL MATCHES IN DESCENDING TITLE IMPORTANCE!)

TNA GLOBAL HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP
ELI DRAKE (C) VS JOHNNY IMPACT (JOHN MORRISON)
Eli sits on the Tna Throne like The Proverbial Orcus, no longer wanting to play ball with management and his public promotional duties, coming out of nowhere is Johnny Impact. ready to play the boy scout (funny that despite the deal with triple a, noone has ever bought up the promo that Morrison cut about "personally giving Trump the final Brick to lay on the Wall!")
MONEY ON: IMPACT!

THE TNA GRAND CHAMPION WILL BE IN ACTION!
6 MAN PROPAGANDA MATCH!
TEAM 'MURICA (EDWARDS/CARTER/STORM) VS TEAM MEXICO (PAGANO/PHANTASMA/TEXANO)
'MURICA! FUCK YEAH!
WE TURNED ETHAN FACE FOR NO REASON TO SAVE THE FUCKING DAY, YEAH!
MONEY ON: 'MURICA!

6 WAY MATCH FOR THE X DIVISION CHAMPIONSHIP
TREVOR LEE(C) VS DEZMOND XAVIER VS GARZA VS PETEY WILLIAMS VS SONJAY DUTT VS MATT SYDAL

This match will probably open the show, in this showcase of the x division!
MONEY ON: Though Williams is making a homecoming in the state of Ontario, Xavier is such a once in a life lifetime wrestler! so my money in on Xavier!

TNA KNOCKOUT'S CHAMPIONSHIP
THE GAIL KIM TESTIMONIAL
GAIL KIM VS SIENNA (C) VS ALLIE
Gail smacked Taryntless Terrell so hard she ended up on the Unemployment Line!
Given this is Gail's last match ever (at least in tna!) and this is in Canada i think we know who is winning...
MONEY ON: SIENNA! GOTCHA! Sienna leaving Canada and leaving Canada's 2 top lady-wrestlers laid out will only strengthen Sienna's role of a heel champion!

5150 STREET FIGHT FOR THE TNA GLOBAL TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIPS
OVERRATED VAPID EVERYTHING (JAKE CRIST/DAKE CRIST) (C) VS LAX (SANTANA/ORTIZ) W/KONNAN
Answers on a postcard what a "5150 street fight" is. Is the white team gonna have guns and tasers, whilst the latinos only have a sock with a brick in it?
Money on: Last week the ove went to another company to fight their jobbers, because tna RAN OUT OF JOBBERS! OVE HAVE NOT IMPRESSED ME, AT ALL! MY MONEY IS ON L.A.X!

SIX SIDES OF STEEL TAG MATCH
BOBBY LASHLEY AND KING BLOW VS  MOOBS AND STEPHAN BONNAR
5 Years later and King Mo is back in tna looking for a paycheck!
i had to do a google search again to find out who is teaming with moose this time, and i must say, Bonnar has better credentials than D'Angelo Williams, so Bonnar will not have kill someone to death with crossbody through a table. Bobby Lashley is leaving wrestling because he is a bitch that can't hack it anymore, and is hanging with these Dude-Bros from American FLOP! Team who will never survive 5 minutes in a wrestling company.
MONEY ON: MOOSE/BONNAR

OH AND BOBBY LASHLEY, KING MO, AND DAN LAMBERT?
HERE IS A MESSAGE TO AMERICAN FLOP TEAM FROM EVERYONE WHO LOVES WRESTLING!
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RED WEDDING (FIRST BLOOD!) MATCH 
ROSEMARY VS TAYA
After shocking the world by Pre-Empting Rosemary's green Mist with one of her on, The Hive Mother has being screaming for Cosplay Game of Throne's Alexa Bliss in a match that will now be made 1st Blood tonight!
MONEY ON: Giving that tna seems to be making taya their Go-to Girl for Fanservice (all you have to do is watch any match since her arrival and count how many times her arse is in camerashot!) they are not going to fuck up her face! My money in on Taya!

MONSTER'S BALL MATCH FOR A WORK VISA!
GRADO VS ABYSS
In the most convoluted, bait and switchy-est, tangled piece of story telling, comes the story of Grado wanting to stay in America. 1st we all thought that this match will end with Grado vs Kongo Kong for the right to marry Not-Charlotte! instead we now have Grado being worked like a mule as his manager, Joseph Park Rakes up the money! When Grado signed his name on the contract of the match, Joe reveal his opponent was "his brother" Abyss!

MONEY ON: TNA HAS HAD A BAD REPUTATION OF USING LOSER LEAVES TOWN MATCHES TO LEGITIMATELY FIRE TALENT! I LOVE GRADO, BUT HE IS LOST IN TRANSLATION IN AMERICA! HIM COMING BACK TO UK WILL DO HIM GOOD!

THAT'S ALL FOR NOW!
THE FINAL POST OF 2017, BOUND FOR GLORY WILL BE UP ON TUESDAY THE 6TH OF NOVEMBER,SOMETHING AFTER 11AM GMT!
PEACE!
If you would like to follow me on Twitter my account is @RealEnli.
See you Tuesday!

EAMONN AKA ENLI

Monday, August 28, 2017

BOY DANCER TO KNIGHT OF THE REALM: A TRIBUTE TO BRUCE FORSYTH

A few weeks ago both sides of the Atlantic lost 2 of it's last Icons. America lost Jerry Lewis, But days before In Britain, a bigger outcry happened.

Bruce Forsyth: Presenter, Dancer, Singer, Actor, Record Breaker, Knight and Entertainer had died. Today we pay homage to the man who was there at the advent of television in the 50s and became it's pacemaker for the next 6 decades!

Born on the 22nd of February in 1928, in the town of Middlesex, Bruce Joseph Forsyth-Johnson was the son of a mechanic both parents played and sang in the Salvation Army band, so at a young age music and charity was at the fore of his upbringing. Inspired by the movies of Fred Astaire, his father once found his 8 year old son dancing on the the roof of his garage. Impressed by his son, he enrolled his son as the only boy in a dance school in Tottenham, Despite being ridiculed at school for being the only boy going to dancing, Dance was everything to Bruce, so much so at the age of 14, Bruce graduated Primary School with hardly had any real formal education to stand on. However he was adamant that he was destined for the stage, Rubbing in the fact he was the only boy in the dance class, "Boy Brucie" made the rounds in clubs and theatres around Britain, his energetic dancing and charismatic Presence earned Forsyth the much better nickname of "The Mighty Atom" which became a song that he incorporated into his act! In 1939, Bruce, still a child, made his television debut in an interview by the talent scout, Jasmine Bligh (the footage has since being lost!)
In 1943, Bruce lost his brother, John, a pilot, to an unfortunate accident during a training exercise in the Royal Air Force Base in Turnberg.

After the War, Bruce, now a strapping , 6 foot teenager continued to travel the length of  War-torn Britain, getting pick up entertainment work wherever he can,  including circuses where his Height and Dancer Athleticism made him a strongman. By 20, like his brother before him Bruce was drafted into the Air Force.

In the 50's the Television became affordable and with it a new breed of entertainer was born. Threatre Impressario, Val Parnell, needed a host for a show, that show became Brucie's big break: Sunday Night at the London Palladium. he also acted as the straightman to another legend, the late, great Norman Wisdom. Dropping Johnson to just Forsyth to play up the class stereotype of someone with an uncommon name. Brucie's Straightman in the double act was always "in Charge" and it would bite him when Norman tried to warn Brucie than something bad was going to happen to him! However Bruce's stage commitments grew when he was on tv, so for all of the 60's Bruce's tv appearances were few and far between!

a Decade later the Brucie 2nd foray as a gameshow host would see him become the face of The Generation Game, a family gameshow where 2 family members a generation or 3 apart, competed against similar family in challenges based on whatever actor, play or film wanted free publicity that week! It was also the place where Brucie's signature entrance, the Thinker Pose made it's debut







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It was also where Bruce met his second wife, his G.G. Co-host, Anthea Redfern, to which he had 3 daughter. he also has 3 other daughters from his previous marriage. Brucie's Presence, catchphrases made him a hot commodity in the entertainment world.  for the next 3 decades, Brucie would be traded back and forth from the BBC to ITV, At Itv Brucie's first show Brucie Big Night was a ratings flop, however the simple formula of Bruce's Play your Cards Right, a game of "Higher or Lower" With cards, proved to be more successful, that when Britain got the rights to make there own Version of The Price is Right, there was only ever one man for the job! In 1981 Bruce Judged that year's Miss World, meeting fellow Judge, Wilnela Merced, a beauty Queen in her own right. 3 years later they married, and remained so til his death last month, where they has Bruce's only son, JJ. In 1986, Bruce tried to break America, to no avail. This meant however that there was no room for any of Bruce's other projects in the 1990's. it seems Bruce Forsyth was going beck and forth reviving the gameshows he hosted, rather than gaining any new projects. By the early 2000s, it looked like An overworked Bruce was ready to retire off our screens for good!

Until 2003 Bruce's career came full circle. The thing that made Brucie, Dance, was back in a big way! Dancing With The Stars ( Called Strictly Come Dancing, or simply Strictly! over in Britain) revitalised the then 70+ Legend's Career, the show was a whirlwind success, the Professional Dancers were overnight stars, Dance schools reflourished, and Bruce was once more the King Of Light Entertainment. He would step down as host in 2014 when illness took over. a year later Bruce suffered a aortic aneurysm that needed surgery. after that, Forsyth made no more public appearances. in February this year he suffered a chest infection and spent 5 days in hospitial. However, his health would deteriorate until on the 18th of August 2017, his Agent confirmed that Sir Bruce Joseph Forsyth-Johnson, OBE, CBE died Peacefully in his Estate in Wentworth aged 89.

Brucie's Indelible influence in Culture will never be erased. His life in entertainment made him a commodity and a litmus test for quality programming. Forsyth is the current Guiness Record Holder for the longest career held by a male performer. In the twillight of his career, Bruce recieved many accolades from his peers until finally and many at the time said it was overdue, Bruce was awarded a knighthood in 2011.

Thank You Brucie,
Thank you for Entertaining Millions
For so Many years
Often Imitated, But Never Matched!
Ever!
RIP
1928-2017