We finally made it!
On so many levels!
We finally start 2019! We finally get to say this blog has being going strong to have a tenth anniversary, And we can say we going strong to break new Ground!
Non-Title Raw tag team match as the Champions Bobby Roode and Chad Gable made quick work of the cobbled together team of Rezar and Scott Dawson, apparently, Dash Wilder and Akam are injured, so why not book an actual team, even if it is non-title? Are the Club really that busy making Rip-off botchamania?
U.S TITLE MATCH IN A NUTSHELL....
Actually... the last time I used that joke, It was when Rusev was Managed by another Inept Blonde Bimbo, Let's not Forget, Vince wants to turn The Tapeworm into the Next Sable...FUCK THAT!
And to continue the theme that Vince thinks Americans don't want to Watch Foreigners, on a worldwide company, PAL!, Buddy Murphy retained because even for a Little Man, Vince loves BEEF!
To the show proper, and I only care about the rumbles so full play by play will be for them only! I'll say that to say this, Becky vs Asuka was a great opener! Asuka Retained after each of them traded and stole moves! But it wasn't finished yet for "The Man" Becky Lynch!
THE END IS NIGH, THE END IS NIGH! COOL DAD AND THE GOBSHITE FROM MTV ARE TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS SO SHANE CAN ABUSE POWER AND MAKE MISTER SHIT CLOTHESLINE LOOK LIKE A PARAGON OF VIRTUE, THE END IS NIGH!
Ronda Rousey had a great match with Sasha Banks, amid rumours that she is leaving wwe to start a family, so fans where booing her a given her the Brock Treatment
HOW IS BROCK FUCKING OFF TO PLAY SOFT BOY RUGBY THE SAME AS A WOMEN DECIDING TO START A FAMILY? I'LL ANSWER IT FOR YOU: IT ISN'T! RONDA IS NOT SELLING OUT, SHE IS CONSIDERING A NATURAL PART OF GROWING UP, SOMETHING A WHOLE LOT OF YOU SAD KEYBOARD WARRIORS WILL NEVER UNDERSTAND!
THE WOMEN'S ROYAL RUMBLE MATCH
#1: Lacey Evans
#2: Natayla
Lacey cuts a promo, to establish her character as an uppity Southern Belle. Nattie Hits a Hip toss and a drop kick on the North Carolina Native
#3: FEMBOT MODEL DESIGNATION "MANDY"
A small attempt of teamwork by the heels backfires when Nattie ties them both up in a sharpshooter
#LIV MORGAN IS NEXT....
#NEWERAMEHOLE!
#5 MICKIE JAMES
Neckbreaker by James, and a mick Kick on Lacey!
#6 EMBER MOON
Cross Body! And front Suplex
#7 MY PICK IN JONN RITLAND'S ROYAL RIMBLE GAME, I HAVE TO SAY NOTHING BUT NICE THINGS ABOUT BILLIE KAY....(PHEW!)
Billie refuses to get until Peyton Royce gets in, because those 2 girls do everything together! (PAUSE FOR DIRTY THOUGHT)
....................................................
#8 NIKKI CROSS! WHO ATTACKS BILLIE
Crossbody takes out everyone!
#9 PEYTON ROYCE
#10 TAMINA, WHO KNOWS A LOT ABOUT DISPOSING WOMEN, SHE GOT IT FROM HER DADDY!
#11 IS CHINA'S XIA LI
Li shows off her impressive Martial Arts Background as Mickie is Eliminated
#12: The Recently Married Sarah Logan: Congrats are in order to her and Rowe!
Running Knee from the Viking maiden, Attempts to eliminate Ember is quashed when she hangs on by her Boots, Nikki is eliminated
#13 CHARLOTTE
Suplex by the Queen, both IIconics Are done, as is Xia Li
#14 KAIRI SANE SAILS INTO PORT!
Tamina is done during her entrance, Elbow Drop on Evans, Sane and Charlotte have a chop Battle!
Logan is done!
#15 FEMBOT MODEL DESIGNATION "MARIA"
Maria did a terrible boot, a terrible Stunner and SET WRESTLING BACK BY EIGHT YEARS TO DO A DANCE: TRANSLATION!
#NAOMI IS 16 WHO ELIMS MANDY OFF THE BAT!
On so many levels!
We finally start 2019! We finally get to say this blog has being going strong to have a tenth anniversary, And we can say we going strong to break new Ground!
Non-Title Raw tag team match as the Champions Bobby Roode and Chad Gable made quick work of the cobbled together team of Rezar and Scott Dawson, apparently, Dash Wilder and Akam are injured, so why not book an actual team, even if it is non-title? Are the Club really that busy making Rip-off botchamania?
U.S TITLE MATCH IN A NUTSHELL....
Actually... the last time I used that joke, It was when Rusev was Managed by another Inept Blonde Bimbo, Let's not Forget, Vince wants to turn The Tapeworm into the Next Sable...FUCK THAT!
And to continue the theme that Vince thinks Americans don't want to Watch Foreigners, on a worldwide company, PAL!, Buddy Murphy retained because even for a Little Man, Vince loves BEEF!
To the show proper, and I only care about the rumbles so full play by play will be for them only! I'll say that to say this, Becky vs Asuka was a great opener! Asuka Retained after each of them traded and stole moves! But it wasn't finished yet for "The Man" Becky Lynch!
THE END IS NIGH, THE END IS NIGH! COOL DAD AND THE GOBSHITE FROM MTV ARE TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS SO SHANE CAN ABUSE POWER AND MAKE MISTER SHIT CLOTHESLINE LOOK LIKE A PARAGON OF VIRTUE, THE END IS NIGH!
Ronda Rousey had a great match with Sasha Banks, amid rumours that she is leaving wwe to start a family, so fans where booing her a given her the Brock Treatment
HOW IS BROCK FUCKING OFF TO PLAY SOFT BOY RUGBY THE SAME AS A WOMEN DECIDING TO START A FAMILY? I'LL ANSWER IT FOR YOU: IT ISN'T! RONDA IS NOT SELLING OUT, SHE IS CONSIDERING A NATURAL PART OF GROWING UP, SOMETHING A WHOLE LOT OF YOU SAD KEYBOARD WARRIORS WILL NEVER UNDERSTAND!
THE WOMEN'S ROYAL RUMBLE MATCH
#1: Lacey Evans
#2: Natayla
Lacey cuts a promo, to establish her character as an uppity Southern Belle. Nattie Hits a Hip toss and a drop kick on the North Carolina Native
#3: FEMBOT MODEL DESIGNATION "MANDY"
A small attempt of teamwork by the heels backfires when Nattie ties them both up in a sharpshooter
#LIV MORGAN IS NEXT....
#NEWERAMEHOLE!
#5 MICKIE JAMES
Neckbreaker by James, and a mick Kick on Lacey!
#6 EMBER MOON
Cross Body! And front Suplex
#7 MY PICK IN JONN RITLAND'S ROYAL RIMBLE GAME, I HAVE TO SAY NOTHING BUT NICE THINGS ABOUT BILLIE KAY....(PHEW!)
Billie refuses to get until Peyton Royce gets in, because those 2 girls do everything together! (PAUSE FOR DIRTY THOUGHT)
....................................................
#8 NIKKI CROSS! WHO ATTACKS BILLIE
Crossbody takes out everyone!
#9 PEYTON ROYCE
#10 TAMINA, WHO KNOWS A LOT ABOUT DISPOSING WOMEN, SHE GOT IT FROM HER DADDY!
#11 IS CHINA'S XIA LI
Li shows off her impressive Martial Arts Background as Mickie is Eliminated
#12: The Recently Married Sarah Logan: Congrats are in order to her and Rowe!
Running Knee from the Viking maiden, Attempts to eliminate Ember is quashed when she hangs on by her Boots, Nikki is eliminated
#13 CHARLOTTE
Suplex by the Queen, both IIconics Are done, as is Xia Li
#14 KAIRI SANE SAILS INTO PORT!
Tamina is done during her entrance, Elbow Drop on Evans, Sane and Charlotte have a chop Battle!
Logan is done!
#15 FEMBOT MODEL DESIGNATION "MARIA"
Maria did a terrible boot, a terrible Stunner and SET WRESTLING BACK BY EIGHT YEARS TO DO A DANCE: TRANSLATION!
 |
| "DID YOU MAKE SURE THE CAMERAMAN TOOK ENOUGH SHOTS OF YOUR ASS?" |
Naomi finds herself outside so she does a kofi back to the steps only for Mandy to knock her off, THIS SHITE IS GOING TO DRAG TIL WRESTLEMANIA AINT IT?
Lacey is done...i really thought they would just gang up on her from minute one, but she had a good run!
#17 IS CANDICE LARAE!
18 IS ALICIA FOOOOOOOOOOXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX!!!!!
....and, THE WEED IS HAS GIVEN FOXY SUPERPOWERS! YEAH SHE NOW HAS EMPHATIC FEELINGS WHENEVER HER HAT GET STEPPED ON! AND BECAUSE MARIA STEPPED ON IT, SHE REALLY HAS STEPPED IN IT! MARIA IS GONZO!
19 IS KACEY KATZI...KATZINTHECRAD....THE NINJA WARRIOR SKANK!
20 IS ZELINA VEGA WHO HIDES UNDER THE RING AFTER SHE AND CANDICE SQUARE UP!
#21 IS RUBY RIOTT, FLANKED BY MORGAN AND LOGAN,
Foxy is up in smoke (so regular Sunday for Foxy!) Candice is done
#22 is DANA "DUCKLIPS WOOHOO!" BROOKE!
Kairi is gone with a Brutal looking Elim, that looked like it hurt!
#23 is IO SHIRAI
Moonsault by the "Sky Genius"
#24 IS RHEA RIPLEY
Kacey is out but hand walk back to the ring, but it's all in vain!
#25 SONYA DEVILLE
Muay Thai Knees by Seville and Dana is gone, Zelina peeks out to taunt...and here is Hornswoggle, who chases Zelina, that's HOW you Eliminate Zelina? After being the last smackdown woman in the Battle Royale at Evolution?
#26 is ALEXA BLISS
Sonya is eliminated
#27 is Bayley
Hugplex by Bayley, Riott and Rhea are eliminated back to back!
#28 LANA WHO "TWISTED HER ANKLE" WHEN SHE COST RUSEV THE US TITLE MATCH! AND GIVE HER A AN OSCAR, SHE IS MILKING IT FOR ALL IT'S WORTH!
#29 THE ANNOYING POTATO NEH-NEH-NEH-NIA JAX
Nia takes out Lana, Io is gone, Nattie is gone
#30 CAMEL-TOE!
Becky comes out with Fit Finlay and they argue with eachother and the EMTs tending Lana, Lana nods to Finlay and that can only MEAN...
#31* BECKY LYNCH REPLACES LANA!
ELIMINATIONS!
- EMBER
- BLISS
- CAMEL-TOE
- BAYLEY WITH A NASTY POTATO BUMP FROM NIA, OFF COURSE!
- NIA GONE
- CHARLOTTE
Bryan Retained the championship when a repackaged Eric Rowan took out Styles. Why not Luke Harper, imagine the team of Harper and Daniel Bryan, that would be amazing!
BROCK TOOK A BEATING BUT I BET HE ONLY FOUGHT BY WHEN HE GOT HIS BANK NOTIFICATION THAT HIS PAY WAS NOW IN HIS CURRENT ACCOUNT! WWE DO SOMETHING WITH FINN OR THE SPOT MONKEYS WILL GIVE HIM AN OFFER!
MEN'S ROYAL RUMBLE
It's Elias the man who plays Guitar, vs Triple J, Jeff Jarrett the Jackass, who Never Drew A Dime! Jarrett gets El Kabonged by Elias
#NUMBER 3: SHINSUKE NAKAMURA
Kinshasa on Elias , Bad Vibrations, Elias counters with Walk with Elias, a corner to Corner Old Skool, a risky and kinda stupid move to pull in a Rumble Match!
#4 AND THAT'S WHY JARRETT FUCKED OFF EARLY, HERE'S KURT ANGLE! THEN BIG E!
Suplex BY E, angle slam, but Angle is Eliminated in an absolute Shocker!
#6 THE NEW NORTH AMERICAN CHAMPION JOHNNY GARGANO
Headscissors by Johnny Wrestling, Slingshot
JIN AND JUICE MAHAL
# 8: SAMOA JOE
Big is eliminated, men are dropping like flies!
#9 CURT HAWKINS, HERE TO WIN CHALLENGE LESNER, BEAT HIM AND RIP THE FABRIC OF REALITY WHEN HE DOES, SETH IS THE TENTH MAN IN!
Falcon Arrow by Rollins, Elias is done!
#TITUS IS IN AND NOW HE ELIMINATED HIMSELF FOR "COMEDY" AND SO IS HAWKINS!
MUSTAFA, ONE OF MY PICKS TO WIN AND KOFI ARE NEXT!
Jawjacker by Ali to Shin who responds with a Strong Style Blitz, Irish whip by Ali who elims Nakamura with a Drop kick. Remember when Nakamura won last year's Royal Rumble? what a sas difference a year makes!
#14 REV UP YOUR SILENT HILL 2 TITTIES FOR DEAN AMBROSE!
Dean goes straight to Rollins! Kofi is thrown out but uses the Apron-Tron's Hard Surface to roll on his hands back to the ring!
#15 NO WAY JOSE IS ALREADY ELIMINATED! I WOULD WANT TO CALL HIM GO AWAY JOSE, BUT IN THE CURRENT POLITICAL CLIMATE THAT WOULD BE FROWNED UPON!
#16 MY PICK TO WIN IT ALL!- DREW MACINTYRE! FOLLOWED BY 17 XAVIER WOODS!
The New day are done after kofi does a second stunt, a piggy back by Woods!
#18 PETE DUNNE THE NXT UK BUT NOT TELEVISED IN THE UK CHAMPION!
German Suplex by Dunne, followed by Mushroom Stomp
#19 ANDRADE AND 20 APOLLO CREWS MEANING DREW ALI AND THEM ALL 4 OF MY SHORTLISTED PICKS ARE IN THE RING!
#21 IS ALIESTER BLACK
...WHO BLACK MASS KICKS DEAN OUT OF THE RING!
#22 IS SHELTON
Joe is eliminated
BALDING FORESKIN IS NEXT FOLLOWED BY METH HARDY!
Twist of Fate by Hardy on Baron, whisper in the wind, and we Aliester is gone so i guess that's a "BLACKOUT?"
....I'LL GET ME COAT!
REY AND BOBBY LASHLEY ARE NEXT!
Lashley gone already...shocker! Corbin chokeslams Rollins!
#27 BRAUN WHO IS REPLACING JOHN CENA
Corbin and Shelton are done!
#28 DOLPH RETURNS AND JEFF IS ELIMINATED DURING HIS ENTRANCE
Dolph goes after drew his former partner who eliminates him!
#29 RANDY ORTON!
Powerslam by Orton, everyone else performs a tower of Power
#30 IS R-TURD...SO WHY DO I SMELL POTATOES AND A COUCH THAT WAS LEFT OUT IN THE RAIN?
BECAUSE HERE IS NIA JAX NOT CONTENT WITH GIVING MANSIZE BEATINGS TO HER OWN GENDER, SHE'S ABOUT TO TURN LOOSE LIKE IKE TURNER!
ORDER OF ELIMATIONS
- Ali get's POTATOWN'D!
- APOLLO IS GONE
- Nia get overpowered by everyone, even taking an RKO!
- ANDRADE is the last of my picks is through
- Ziggler
- ORTON
BUT WHO DOES HE FACE? I WOULD ASSUME BROCK ONCE MORE! BUT WHO KNOWS?
FOLLOW ME ON TWITTER (@RealEnli)
Until Next time! PEACE!
