Wednesday, August 19, 2015

WWE Summerslam predictions

I'm back!....doing predictions and tumbling, but I'll be back reviewing wrestling back in September, my 2 month sabbatical is nearly over and my health has nearly restored, but I'm not at full vigour just yet!As such, and despite what my schedule says, i will NOT be watching summerslam live! which means results will be commissioned onto enlightenedtowers.tumblr.com as a Second Hand Smoke Episode, on monday!

WWE CHAMPIONSHIP AND US CHAMPIONSHIP WINNER TAKES ALL MATCH!
SETH ROLLINS LOSES TO, I MEAN VS JOHN FUCKING CENA!
CENAWINSLOL!
CENAWINSLOL!
CENAWINSLOL!
SPOILERS*CENAWINSLOL!
MONEY ON! SETH ROLLINS-I JUST YANKING YOUR CHAIN!-CENAWINSLOL!

SHIT SANDWICH FOR THE INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPIONSHIT
 STEROID BACK(C) VS THE BIG SHITE! VS GOBSHITE FROM MTV!
This match will not go away! it has to happen! even cancelling it when Ryback NEARLY HAD HIS LEG AMPUTATED! Didn't kill the beast. Sadly, Miz and show has loss on tv this week and no matches on Superstars so thier chances of winning has ballooned
MONEY ON: IF ONLY RYBACK HAD A STRAIGHT TO DVD MOVIE TO PROMOTE THIS MONTH! THEN HE'LL KEEP HIS CHAMPIONSHIP!

4-WAY MATCH FOR THE TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIP
PRIME TIME PLAYERS(C) (YOUNG/O'NEILL) VS NEW DAY(TIT E/ KOBE JOHNSON) VS LOS LATINOS STERIOTYPICOS (JOBBERCO UNO Y JOBBERCO DOS) VS LUCHA DRAGONS (CALISTO Y SIN CARA) 
Okay, i have no idea how to call this one! The PTP have a match this week on Superstars. but that usually means they will retain their championship. all the other teams have stakes to the belts and the reason why i assumed kofi and e will the duo in this match, well I'll get to that at rumoured matches section!
MONEY ON: THIS IS A TOUGH ONE, BUT PCP TO RETAIN!

9 WOMAN CLUSTERFUCK INCLUDING THE DIVAS CHAMPION
TEAM BELLA (Nikki/Brie/Alicia) vs TEAM PCB (Paige/Charlotte/Lynch) vs Team B.A.D (Sasha/Tamina/Naomi)
Wow. Sasha is on double duty this weekend, not only in this match, but a title match against Bayley, the night before! A loss of that title will light a fire under her!
MONEY ON: SCENARO 1: BAD WINS Because losing the women's title will make Sasha go Ape-shit!
SCENARO 2: FACES WIN in both scenaros bellas lose because this match is non-title, And they have book CENA'S HO! to lose once and a while!

BROCK LESNAR VS THE UNDERTAKER
This is the match everyone is taking about! the revenge match that took 2 years almost to get around! This will deliver!
MONEY ON: TAKER!

RUSEV VS DOLPH ZIGGLER
....Sadly this won't deliver! It's clear that Dolph hasn't signed an extension to this contract to be put in shit like this! but it's not a mixed tag with a girl isn't a wrestler and a girl who can't wrestle...yet! so be thankful for small mercies!
MONEY ON: ZIGGLER!

BLANDY BORE-TON VS LAMEARSE!
Seriously Triple-H? if they can't share Bastista's unlimited title shot game genie, then no-one should have it!
Money on: Orton to win but see rumoured matches below!

WYATT FAMILY VS DEAN AMBROSE AND ROMAN "THE WANK PHEASANT" REIGNS!
This is so ovivously a heel turn set-up! Look at Reigns-Handsome, 3rd generation, and poster boy for the amercian adoption agency and family man, and Dean Ambrose-Sleazy, dress like a hobo, makes faces like a he's sniffed every thing in bathroom cabinet! and fights like he's being paid in sandwiches, and business has being slow!
Money on: Wyatt. Welcome to the Family Dean!

MATCH OF THE NIGHT!
CESARO VS KEVIN OWENS 
Sadly This watch will be missed but apart from this and Lesner and Undertaker i would be paying for only 2 good matches! this match like The 9 woman Clusterfuck! will teter on events at Takeover the night before! But Backstage whispering has told me that wwe creative has soured on Kevin Owens because of his weight, and maybe that's why Cesaro is getting is a look-in, because there only room in the doghouse for 1 at a time!
MONEY: ON CESARO (WHETHER FINN BALOR WILL MAKE AN APPEARANCE IS ANYONE'S GUESS!)

SHITE!
ADRIAN NEVILLE & STEPHEN AMELL VS KING BARRETT & TIM CURRY STARDUST
THERE ARE NO WORDS TO DESCRIBE THIS MATCH, ONLY PICTURES!

Image result for cornette face
RUMOURED MATCHES!/EVENTS
Xavier woods vs Mini Mantaur
Dark Matches and promos by Nxt stars
Padding with John Stewart
Summerslam has 4 official theme songs and the show is 4 hours-expect mini-concert bullshit!
 
 well that's it!
ENLIGHTENED TOWERS WILL REOPEN ON SEPTEMBER WITH MY WINTER SCHEDULE! Results of summerslam will we written at enlightenedtowers.tumblr.com on monday! to tie you over until then, checkout my movie reviews at boggerboxoffice.blogspot.com including a this month's review of This is it!

I',ll see you here in a fortnight!
PEACE!

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