Hello everyone, Or should that be my first "Greetings From Ireland" of the new Decade? If you are not new here I'll give you the skinny for the way i review the Rumble ppv....The Rumbles matter, everything else is just fluff!
On the Preshow...Which i can now watch every month thanks to the new British Tv Deal! Lame-Arse won against #HisNameIsChadGable! who saw that coming?
Andrade and the White Power Ranger put on a great match...that noone care about! Andrade won with the FUCKING ROLL-UP!
#BANTHEROLLUP!
Wait It's 2020 and i'm making Rollup and Lame-Arse Joke like it's 2010 again?
To the show itself, Roman Reigns defeated King Barren Foreskin in a plodding, tectonic Falls count Anywhere Match! Corbin's Lackies attacked Reigns only for the Usos to save their cousin, Roman won by Spearing Boring of a "Dugout" whatever that is!
Who Bright Idea was it to have Shameless Pervert Jerry the King Lawler call the women's rumble? I Will like to warn that there will be Gratuitous overuse of the "ANNNNNDDDDD (S)HE'S GONE!" Meme from here on out!
#NUMBER 1-ALEXA BLISS (SD!)
#NUMBER 2-BIANCA BELAIR (NXT)
Belair showing a great combination of strength and Agilty with flips and power moves.
#NUMBER 3-MIGHTY MOLLY (ALUMNI)
Coming in with a crossbody, the former women's champion takes out both opponents!
#NUMBER 4-NIKKI CROSS (SD!)
Nikki in to save her tag partner Bliss but get's Belair's K.O.D.
#NUMBER 5-THE TAPEWORM (RAW)
Oh fuck Lana is cutting a promo!
#NUMBER 6- MERCEDES MARTINEZ (NXT)
Mercedes in with a tour de force whooping everyone!
#NUMBER 7-LIV MORGAN (RAW)
Thank Fucking Christ! Lana is elimed by Liv...but since it's Liv We are Talking we are talking about...
Lana and Liv continue to fight...this is a fucking marquee match at Mania...isn't it?
#8 IS MANDY ROSE AND 9 IS CANDICE LERAE
Moonsault by LeRae Molly is Eliminated, Mandy would be elimed, if Otis didn't Appear from nowhere! How did Get there without anyone noticing, he must be a 300 pound Ninja!
Leading us to NUMBER 10 Being SONYA DEVILLE
Both Fire and Desire Members double team with a Clinch Knee on Mercedes and that has soften her up to be eliminated
#11 is KAIRI SAINE One half of the wwe women's tag champions
Double Spear on Bliss and Nikki, Running Blockbuster!
#NUMBER 12 IS MIA YIM
Yim in with Leaping neckbreakers and Eat Defeat. Nikki is Eliminated, Mandy and Sonya are eliminated when Otis Couldn't Carry both
DANA BROOKE, THE MOST IMPROVED WOMAN IN THE DIVISION IS 13TH!
Very nice Senton from Brooke and an Enzirgiri too, Bianca elims Candice with a Military Press, Kairi day is done too!
#14 TAMINA STILL WORKS HERE!
DAKOTA KAI IS 15TH
Mia is gone!
#16-CHELSEA GREEN
Huh looks like you can Sexually Transmit Jobber from fucking Zack Ryder...But She did Elim Kai in a shocker!
Brooke and Bliss are eliminated by Belair she is only woman and now must face...
#17 CHARLOTTE FLAIR (SD!)
Backbreaker by flair and then some chops
#18 NAOMI (RAW)
Double team suplex by the faces on Belair
#19 From the Commentary box to competition, here is BETH PHOENIX THE HALL OF FAMER!
Crossbody to enter, to roaring chorus of you still got it!
#20 -TONI STORM! (NXTUK)
After a great showing, Belair Bows out!
#21 is KELLY KELLY...
Who should never be asked to come back ever again! She busted open Charlotte hardway and Charlotte bleed everywhere...mostly into Beth's Hair and When Charlotte Throw the Stupid Cunt out she called her A Bitch in Camera!
BUT NOT BEFORE THE DRAWING OF NUMBER 22 SARAH LOGAN AND YEP!
NATTIE IS 23 AND SHE AND BETH HAVE A DIVAS OF DOOM REUNION!
Discus Clothesline then a double powerbomb
XIA LI, ZELINA VEGA , SHOTZI BLACKHEART AND CARMELLA
Carmella with her version of Skank Skank's Creaming Headscissors the Mella-Go-Round which had King asking if Corey Graves loved that!
(LAUGHTER)
Grave Stuffed Mella like a Christmas Turkey behind his wife's back, then left her for Carmella,siting Mental Health Issues...that he caused....by cheating on her!
#28 TEGAN NOX Who comes in with a Chokeslam, walkis into A glam slam and is eliminated
#29 is.....SHITETINA MARELLA!
Beth still pissed that about what Santino Did at wrestlemania 25, surrounds Santina with Nattie, Santino eliminates himself and for all the Idiots who were cheering for this is Houston ,no Offence to my friends in Texas (HEY LIQUID IMPACT, HOW YOU DOIN?) BUT YOU ARE THE REASON A WALL IS BEING BUILD TO STOP PEOPLE TAKING YER JOOOOOOBBBBSSSSSS!
#NUMBER 30 WAS A GAME CHANGER-SHAYNA BASLER!
Final Elims
Smackdown women's match was meh, Strap Match told a story at least, Raw women's match was a little bit better!
AND NOW A SALUTE OF ALL THE MEN WHO WERE DIRECTLY BURIED BY VINCE MACMAHON THROUGH HIS BIG BEEFY WET DREAM MADE FLESH-BROCK LESNER!
Elias
Rowan
Robert Roode-should have stuck to Pepsi!
John Morrison-Only back to complete the full circle and to make a Joke from a mtv show look good by giving him cheap wins!
SON GOHAN KINGSTON-HE REALLY HAS PEAKED!
Big E
Rey Mysterio-also denied his receipt
Cesaro-OH LEAST WE FORGET "GO HOME AND MAKE CHOCOLATES, PAL!"
SHELTON BENJAMIN
Shinsuke Nakamura-Vince McMahon loves Big Sweaty Men, Vince mcmahon Hates Foreigners!
MVP-left the engine on causes he's local!
KEITH LEE AND BRAUN
#VINCEMACHONLOVESBIGSWEATYMEN
The Match officially starts at #15 with Ricochet and Drew at 16
Trevor kicks Brock in the Love-Spuds and Drew throws him out!
#17 IS GOBSHITE FROM MTV!
#18 IS AJ STYLES
Phenomenal Forearm Misses Vertical Suplex by Mcintyre countered in the calfcrusher as the clock ticks down.
# 19 DOLPH ZIGGLER FOLLOWED BY KARL ANDERSON
#21 IN A HUGE MOMENT, EDGE
Spears for everyone! Edge has being gone for 9 years with Injures that were told were life-limiting but he looked good!
#22 IS KING BORING
Styles is Eliminated
#23 MATT RIDDLE BUT HIS CHANCES ARE ALREADY UP IN SMOKE!
#24 LUKE GALLOWS
Corbin is gone
Magic Killer has the Orange County Club Without Bullets team up
#25 is RANDY ORTON
Rated RKO is reunited and they elim the OC
Roman reigns is 26...the only number never to begat a winner in this match!
Ziggler is gone
#27 is Kevin owens
Cannonballs to everyone, Pop-Up Powerbomb, Stunner
#28 ALIESTER BLACK
#29 SAMOA JOE
#30 SETH ROLLINS THE NEW RAW TAG TEAM CHAMPION FLANKED BY BUDDY MURPHY AND THE AUTHORS OF PAIN
Final Eliminations
One Day removed from Burn's Night, The Scottish People have more reason to celebrate!
What a Journey it has being and Drew Deserves it!
Well WWE CAN Shove Blood Money up it's arse! and with Itv Box office dead, and Aew Revolution next month i can only wait and see if it's available! But for WWE the next time you see me will be Wrestlemania! But Between now and there, I'm waiting for the new Icecreams to be revealed and reviewed!
Follow me on Twitter @RealEnli!
CREDITS
Images use From
"They for Everybody" By Juicy J Which is Property of Vevo
MST3K Which Property of Alternaversal Studios
South Park which is Property of Comedy Central
WWE
All Media used belong to their respective owners.
All rights Reversed.
On the Preshow...Which i can now watch every month thanks to the new British Tv Deal! Lame-Arse won against #HisNameIsChadGable! who saw that coming?
Andrade and the White Power Ranger put on a great match...that noone care about! Andrade won with the FUCKING ROLL-UP!
#BANTHEROLLUP!
Wait It's 2020 and i'm making Rollup and Lame-Arse Joke like it's 2010 again?
To the show itself, Roman Reigns defeated King Barren Foreskin in a plodding, tectonic Falls count Anywhere Match! Corbin's Lackies attacked Reigns only for the Usos to save their cousin, Roman won by Spearing Boring of a "Dugout" whatever that is!
Who Bright Idea was it to have Shameless Pervert Jerry the King Lawler call the women's rumble? I Will like to warn that there will be Gratuitous overuse of the "ANNNNNDDDDD (S)HE'S GONE!" Meme from here on out!
#NUMBER 1-ALEXA BLISS (SD!)
#NUMBER 2-BIANCA BELAIR (NXT)
Belair showing a great combination of strength and Agilty with flips and power moves.
#NUMBER 3-MIGHTY MOLLY (ALUMNI)
Coming in with a crossbody, the former women's champion takes out both opponents!
#NUMBER 4-NIKKI CROSS (SD!)
Nikki in to save her tag partner Bliss but get's Belair's K.O.D.
#NUMBER 5-THE TAPEWORM (RAW)
Oh fuck Lana is cutting a promo!
#NUMBER 6- MERCEDES MARTINEZ (NXT)
Mercedes in with a tour de force whooping everyone!
#NUMBER 7-LIV MORGAN (RAW)
Thank Fucking Christ! Lana is elimed by Liv...but since it's Liv We are Talking we are talking about...
Lana and Liv continue to fight...this is a fucking marquee match at Mania...isn't it?
#8 IS MANDY ROSE AND 9 IS CANDICE LERAE
Moonsault by LeRae Molly is Eliminated, Mandy would be elimed, if Otis didn't Appear from nowhere! How did Get there without anyone noticing, he must be a 300 pound Ninja!
Leading us to NUMBER 10 Being SONYA DEVILLE
Both Fire and Desire Members double team with a Clinch Knee on Mercedes and that has soften her up to be eliminated
#11 is KAIRI SAINE One half of the wwe women's tag champions
Double Spear on Bliss and Nikki, Running Blockbuster!
#NUMBER 12 IS MIA YIM
Yim in with Leaping neckbreakers and Eat Defeat. Nikki is Eliminated, Mandy and Sonya are eliminated when Otis Couldn't Carry both
DANA BROOKE, THE MOST IMPROVED WOMAN IN THE DIVISION IS 13TH!
Very nice Senton from Brooke and an Enzirgiri too, Bianca elims Candice with a Military Press, Kairi day is done too!
#14 TAMINA STILL WORKS HERE!
DAKOTA KAI IS 15TH
Mia is gone!
#16-CHELSEA GREEN
Huh looks like you can Sexually Transmit Jobber from fucking Zack Ryder...But She did Elim Kai in a shocker!
Brooke and Bliss are eliminated by Belair she is only woman and now must face...
#17 CHARLOTTE FLAIR (SD!)
Backbreaker by flair and then some chops
#18 NAOMI (RAW)
Double team suplex by the faces on Belair
#19 From the Commentary box to competition, here is BETH PHOENIX THE HALL OF FAMER!
Crossbody to enter, to roaring chorus of you still got it!
#20 -TONI STORM! (NXTUK)
After a great showing, Belair Bows out!
#21 is KELLY KELLY...
Who should never be asked to come back ever again! She busted open Charlotte hardway and Charlotte bleed everywhere...mostly into Beth's Hair and When Charlotte Throw the Stupid Cunt out she called her A Bitch in Camera!
BUT NOT BEFORE THE DRAWING OF NUMBER 22 SARAH LOGAN AND YEP!
NATTIE IS 23 AND SHE AND BETH HAVE A DIVAS OF DOOM REUNION!
Discus Clothesline then a double powerbomb
XIA LI, ZELINA VEGA , SHOTZI BLACKHEART AND CARMELLA
Carmella with her version of Skank Skank's Creaming Headscissors the Mella-Go-Round which had King asking if Corey Graves loved that!
(LAUGHTER)
Grave Stuffed Mella like a Christmas Turkey behind his wife's back, then left her for Carmella,siting Mental Health Issues...that he caused....by cheating on her!
#28 TEGAN NOX Who comes in with a Chokeslam, walkis into A glam slam and is eliminated
#29 is.....SHITETINA MARELLA!
Beth still pissed that about what Santino Did at wrestlemania 25, surrounds Santina with Nattie, Santino eliminates himself and for all the Idiots who were cheering for this is Houston ,no Offence to my friends in Texas (HEY LIQUID IMPACT, HOW YOU DOIN?) BUT YOU ARE THE REASON A WALL IS BEING BUILD TO STOP PEOPLE TAKING YER JOOOOOOBBBBSSSSSS!
#NUMBER 30 WAS A GAME CHANGER-SHAYNA BASLER!
Final Elims
- Zelina/Shotzi
- Carmella
- Naomi
- Xia
- Nattie
- Beth
- Shayna after an exchange that has future match written all over it!
Smackdown women's match was meh, Strap Match told a story at least, Raw women's match was a little bit better!
AND NOW A SALUTE OF ALL THE MEN WHO WERE DIRECTLY BURIED BY VINCE MACMAHON THROUGH HIS BIG BEEFY WET DREAM MADE FLESH-BROCK LESNER!
Elias
Rowan
Robert Roode-should have stuck to Pepsi!
John Morrison-Only back to complete the full circle and to make a Joke from a mtv show look good by giving him cheap wins!
SON GOHAN KINGSTON-HE REALLY HAS PEAKED!
Big E
Rey Mysterio-also denied his receipt
Cesaro-OH LEAST WE FORGET "GO HOME AND MAKE CHOCOLATES, PAL!"
SHELTON BENJAMIN
Shinsuke Nakamura-Vince McMahon loves Big Sweaty Men, Vince mcmahon Hates Foreigners!
MVP-left the engine on causes he's local!
KEITH LEE AND BRAUN
#VINCEMACHONLOVESBIGSWEATYMEN
The Match officially starts at #15 with Ricochet and Drew at 16
Trevor kicks Brock in the Love-Spuds and Drew throws him out!
#17 IS GOBSHITE FROM MTV!
#18 IS AJ STYLES
Phenomenal Forearm Misses Vertical Suplex by Mcintyre countered in the calfcrusher as the clock ticks down.
# 19 DOLPH ZIGGLER FOLLOWED BY KARL ANDERSON
#21 IN A HUGE MOMENT, EDGE
Spears for everyone! Edge has being gone for 9 years with Injures that were told were life-limiting but he looked good!
#22 IS KING BORING
Styles is Eliminated
#23 MATT RIDDLE BUT HIS CHANCES ARE ALREADY UP IN SMOKE!
#24 LUKE GALLOWS
Corbin is gone
Magic Killer has the Orange County Club Without Bullets team up
#25 is RANDY ORTON
Rated RKO is reunited and they elim the OC
Roman reigns is 26...the only number never to begat a winner in this match!
Ziggler is gone
#27 is Kevin owens
Cannonballs to everyone, Pop-Up Powerbomb, Stunner
#28 ALIESTER BLACK
#29 SAMOA JOE
#30 SETH ROLLINS THE NEW RAW TAG TEAM CHAMPION FLANKED BY BUDDY MURPHY AND THE AUTHORS OF PAIN
Final Eliminations
- Black after being ganged up on
- Owens
- Joe
- Seth
- Orton
- Edge
- Reigns
One Day removed from Burn's Night, The Scottish People have more reason to celebrate!
What a Journey it has being and Drew Deserves it!
Well WWE CAN Shove Blood Money up it's arse! and with Itv Box office dead, and Aew Revolution next month i can only wait and see if it's available! But for WWE the next time you see me will be Wrestlemania! But Between now and there, I'm waiting for the new Icecreams to be revealed and reviewed!
Follow me on Twitter @RealEnli!
CREDITS
Images use From
"They for Everybody" By Juicy J Which is Property of Vevo
MST3K Which Property of Alternaversal Studios
South Park which is Property of Comedy Central
WWE
All Media used belong to their respective owners.
All rights Reversed.
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