"Dey Say dat da Gawds ov Auld Use t'play Games wif the Souls ov Mortal Men"
Deep inside The Forge Of Creation, such a game was taking place as the ethereal creatures gathered to watch the game of the lives of those attempting to reach the forge outside. The Game was against Wrath and Change. Wrath Controlling pieces of Leader's Army, rolled a 20 sided dice, getting 20, he swung an Appendage across the table toppling Change's pieces of our heroes over. In the spirit's Hubris, the dice also flew off the table!
GWAHAHAHAHAHA! lOOKS lIKE i wIN, sISTER!
-oH bROTHER, tHIS iS nOT yOUR gAME iN wASHINGTON, yOUR sHORT tERM gAINS iS a wEAK sTRATEGY
...
aS lONG aS tHE dICE cONTINUES tO rOLL hIGHER tHAN 1 tHE gAME wILL cONTINUE!
(The dice landed on between the joins of a tiled floor, If the Cosmic Entities wished to have features, then Wrath's smile would have widened as the top number was 1. Chance waved her appendage, the dice loosened itself and feel flat on 2. Though it meant the odds were not in our heroes favour, at least they didn't die! This Move caused Wrath to cause a landslide in Norway out of a temper tantrum)
yOU uSED yOUR pOWERS! tHAT'S nOT fAIR!
-tHIS gAME iS lIFE, bROTHER! oF cOURSE it's nOT fAIR!
-bUT yOUR mOVE oNLY sERVED tO dENY mY vICTORY!
-aND hOW iS lEADER cAPTURING eLEPHANT, oUR bROTHER, a vICTORY fOR yOU?
-rIGHT nOW, fOCUS oN yOUR oWN pIECES, sISTER!
(The Wormhole Opened, and with a bit of luck, Joe-Jack and Yusef, Landed not in a different dimension, but on top of the Airship, Yusef said that they landed close to the engines. the 2 dimensional counterparts smiled over their beards, drew their weapons and charged!....)
AND NOW OUR FEATURE PRESENTATION
(DUE TO THIS REVIEW WRITTEN IN THE STYLE OF JOE-JACK, ALL SPELLING ALL GRAMMAR MISTAKES ARE INTENTIONAL!)
This month's theme
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v--IqqusnNQ
It Seemz dat Disnee 'as t'turn all itz riodes intah fillium, becoz dey rans out of eye-deers! Pie-Ratz of da Curry-bean? 4 filliums, and one comin' soon! Tower ov Terror? a tv fillium dat was bettah dan it should have being! and today's part 2 ov dis years finallayer , A doccer mentree abou' da Marz Mission, which is a new attract-ee-on!
Da fillium starts be a sweepin' shot of Mars, for Yar bigshot eggheads have looked at Mars an' wondered if dey iz or woz liofe on da Red Planet!
WELL OV COURSE DERE IS/ FOR DA EVIL OV MARS IS RESPONIBIBBLE FER DA GREATEST EVIL OV ALL THE TIOMES!
ANCIENT EEGIP!
And Ya Laff, But tell me diz, where do ya think DEY GOT DA EYE-DEAR FOR DA PYRAMIDS AND DA SPHINCTER FROM?
Deep inside The Forge Of Creation, such a game was taking place as the ethereal creatures gathered to watch the game of the lives of those attempting to reach the forge outside. The Game was against Wrath and Change. Wrath Controlling pieces of Leader's Army, rolled a 20 sided dice, getting 20, he swung an Appendage across the table toppling Change's pieces of our heroes over. In the spirit's Hubris, the dice also flew off the table!
GWAHAHAHAHAHA! lOOKS lIKE i wIN, sISTER!
-oH bROTHER, tHIS iS nOT yOUR gAME iN wASHINGTON, yOUR sHORT tERM gAINS iS a wEAK sTRATEGY
...
aS lONG aS tHE dICE cONTINUES tO rOLL hIGHER tHAN 1 tHE gAME wILL cONTINUE!
(The dice landed on between the joins of a tiled floor, If the Cosmic Entities wished to have features, then Wrath's smile would have widened as the top number was 1. Chance waved her appendage, the dice loosened itself and feel flat on 2. Though it meant the odds were not in our heroes favour, at least they didn't die! This Move caused Wrath to cause a landslide in Norway out of a temper tantrum)
yOU uSED yOUR pOWERS! tHAT'S nOT fAIR!
-tHIS gAME iS lIFE, bROTHER! oF cOURSE it's nOT fAIR!
-bUT yOUR mOVE oNLY sERVED tO dENY mY vICTORY!
-aND hOW iS lEADER cAPTURING eLEPHANT, oUR bROTHER, a vICTORY fOR yOU?
-rIGHT nOW, fOCUS oN yOUR oWN pIECES, sISTER!
(The Wormhole Opened, and with a bit of luck, Joe-Jack and Yusef, Landed not in a different dimension, but on top of the Airship, Yusef said that they landed close to the engines. the 2 dimensional counterparts smiled over their beards, drew their weapons and charged!....)
AND NOW OUR FEATURE PRESENTATION
(DUE TO THIS REVIEW WRITTEN IN THE STYLE OF JOE-JACK, ALL SPELLING ALL GRAMMAR MISTAKES ARE INTENTIONAL!)
This month's theme
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v--IqqusnNQ
It Seemz dat Disnee 'as t'turn all itz riodes intah fillium, becoz dey rans out of eye-deers! Pie-Ratz of da Curry-bean? 4 filliums, and one comin' soon! Tower ov Terror? a tv fillium dat was bettah dan it should have being! and today's part 2 ov dis years finallayer , A doccer mentree abou' da Marz Mission, which is a new attract-ee-on!
Da fillium starts be a sweepin' shot of Mars, for Yar bigshot eggheads have looked at Mars an' wondered if dey iz or woz liofe on da Red Planet!
WELL OV COURSE DERE IS/ FOR DA EVIL OV MARS IS RESPONIBIBBLE FER DA GREATEST EVIL OV ALL THE TIOMES!
ANCIENT EEGIP!
 |
| "IMPERIAL MARCH PLAYS IN BACKGROUND!" |
We Cut t' Eggheadz actin' busy when they notice da da camera, One geol....geolollygolli....ROCK DOCTAH! Claims dat word i can defo pronounce is lioke Detective Work
NOAH!
IT REALLY ISN'T!
Becoz ov our limitz in technomology, we can't send a rock doctah t'Mars, but we can send a robot t'Mars, So Nasa Builds a New Virgin ov a Moon Rovah dat can collect samples, but one dat is built to withstand weather and temperature, tings dat da Moon doesn't have in Vacuum ov Space.
OR YE CAN FAKE IT LIKE DA MOON LANDIN'S! LIOKE ANYONE CAN BELIEVE DAT LOUIS ARMSTONG WAS EVAH ON DA MOON!
So work on da Rovah Starts, but dere is a problem, da only time dey can launch it without going wrong is when Mars is in our line ov sight, And Even then it can still fuck up big tiome! Not only dat but the rovah must be able t'man it's own spaceship, once made Pacifically fer this ship, dis Carrier is described as a piece ov origiami by the way it's made of delicate parts that fold, However it may not suit the journey, as da Surface ov Mars has more broken machinery in it's landscape dan a housing estate in Stab City!, Describing the 8 MONTH journey from Earth as shooting a basketball fromLA to New York without the ball ever touching the ground.
To Double dare chances, Nasa built 2 Rovah's, Spirit, An' Opera Tune Nitty. Underestimating the size of the Rovah's, ev'rything from da pods to the Hairbags have to be bigger, tearin' everytime in the test area!
Howevah, testing the arms n' suspension ov da rovah iz more successful, usin' a clevah system of 6 interdependent wheelz to adjust to the terrain ov Mars, which is basically a large dust clod made solid be downward Pressah!
Da Day Ov da Launch iz fastly approaching and da eggheadz are all emotional about their work, it's lioke a bunch of Parentz saying goodbye to their childer overseas, Dese Rovah's will never see Planet Earf evah ageen!
UNLESS THEY ARE MELTED DOWN INTO A THRONE BE MARTIAN WARLORDS!
Spirit is Launched in an animation probably used for the ride, the Rocket doesn't go straight to Mars rather breaks up in shite in the air to launch da pod, an hope fer da besht!
7 months later and Nasa waits for word from Spirits Computah! Despite a Bumpy Landing, Spirit is online and taking pictures from the Red Planet.
Once Online, Spirits mission t'Gustav Crater, a Suspected Dried up lake is up and running, however all spirit finds iz igneous rocks, So Spirit is commanded is go to Columbia Mountains, a Journey that is 600 miles a journey Spirit will probably never make. On Da other side of Mars, Opera Tune Nitty has Literally landed on the other side of Mars and on a bedrock, one that containz "Geologic Truth" Stones that could only be formed be the presence of Water! Spirit is havin' worse luck, it's solar panels have being covered in dust and left it immobile , weeks later a chance wind cleans the panels and the rovah lives on! however machinery are not built to last forever, eventually both rovahs will break down an die!
With Water Confirmed, Phase 2 can start confirming if liofe existed on Marz, but that will never happen in our liofetime!
Doccer Mentries are reviewed differently dan filliums, while a movie iz meant t' entertain, a doccer mentrie is meant t' inform, this does the job, though yer have to laugh at da eggheadz when dey say tings like "Sedimentary Rocks Keep Me Awake At Night!)
(Eamonn woke in the brig of the airship, a Paladin opened the door with a palm print scan,
"MY LEADER WISHES TO SEE YOU" Said the distorted voice. Eamonn stood and looked at down, "Great, no Gae Dearg, no gun, no backup. Dahm!" He was lead into a room ordained with Propaganda Art, The Leader posed as a great protector of his Planet, one as a farmer tilling soil with his Followers, one more disturbing painting was him dressed a knight fighting a Hydra with the heads of the Religious leaders of the world's heads being severed by a sword that read "TRUTH". There Were many statues, too, of all those Leader defeated, the stone doppelgangers posed them begging for mercy! The Leader was with a Sculptor, Dressed as Eamonn in such a pose he turned his head slightly to see him
"Oh so you are Awake, Forgive me for dressing like you, But Since we are so Alike, I needed a new statue commissioned to celebrate my coming victory to take pride of place in my Hall of Heroic Fools!"
You know who can't win, I don't care if you are a me who couldn't cope and bears grudges! we a nothing alike!
WELL OF COURSE NOT! BECAUSE I AM NOT A FAILURE! YOU LIKE MANY OF THOSE WITH OUR CONDITION HAVE TRIED TO MAKE THOSE UNDERSTAND! THEY WILL NEVER UNDERSTAND WHAT IT IS LIKE TO AUTISTIC! NEVER! SO IF THEY CAN'T UNDERSTAND...I WILL MAKE THEM UNDERSTAND! I WILL THEM ALL KNOW THE COLOUR AND HOPE AND WONDER IS ALL BUT AN ILLUSION MADE BY THE OVERWHELMING, CRUSHING CRUELTY OF EXISTANCE, WE NOT MADE OF STARS! EAMONN, WE ARE NOTHING BUT PILES OF DUST!
(WHAT FOLLOWED WAS A HIGH PITCHED DERANGED GIGGLE, THAT DISTURBED EAMONN! WHAT WAS EVEN LOUDER! WAS THE ENGINES EXPLODING!)
REPORT!
"My Leader, we have being sabotaged by the Pimpernel"
(Meanwhile, Yusef and Joe-Jack Based jumped of the Airship onto a hillside, they looked up to see it explode. In front of them, a portal opened, out stepped 80's lad and Oracle, who hugged Yusef straight away, 80's Lad teleported away, leaving the portal open,
-and where is he goin'
-he has his own mission, something about a "being Plan A For a Change" so what happened?
-WE DID IT. OLD GIRL! We destroyed the Doomed Salvation!
-DOOMED SALVATION? WHAT'S DAT?
-THE NAME OF THE AIRSHIP!
-I THOUGHTZ DA AIRSHIP WAS CALLED DA TERROR?
-AND WHAT MADE YOU THINK THAT?
-FOR MONTHS YE WERE SAYING THAT WE MUST STOP DA TERROR FROM COMIN' TO EARF! WELL IF DAT WAS NOT DA TERROR? THEN WHAT IZ?
(IN THE WRECKAGE, LEADER BUSTED FROM BEING BURIED BY RUBBLE, HIS GAUNTLETS GLOWING AND SPINNING LIKE ZOETROPES AROUND HIS WRISTS, BY SOME FORTUNE, EAMONN LANDED ON A NOW DESTROYED SAFE THAT HEAD HIS OWN GAUNTLET!
FOOL! I WAS GOING TO SPARE YOU! I WAS GOING TO SEED MY SECOND EMPIRE AND LET YOU TEND TO A SECULAR PARADISE! INSTEAD I WILL RAZE YOUR MISBEGOTTEN PLANET LIKE THE WORTHLESS FIELD OF CHAFF IT IS!
.....TO BE CONTINUED ON THE 2ND OF MAY ON BOGGER BOX OFFICE! AND REMEMBER NO MATTER WHO MUCH LIFE GETS YOU DOWN, NO MATTER HOW MUCH YOU THINK THE WORLD CAN NEVER UNDERSTAND YOU FOR BEING YOU SOMETIMES MUCH LIKE THE FILM WORTHY ENOUGH TO BE SO SHIT TO BE A FINALE OF THIS SEASON, SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO...
ONLY ON BOGGER BOX OFFICE!
Howevah, testing the arms n' suspension ov da rovah iz more successful, usin' a clevah system of 6 interdependent wheelz to adjust to the terrain ov Mars, which is basically a large dust clod made solid be downward Pressah!
Da Day Ov da Launch iz fastly approaching and da eggheadz are all emotional about their work, it's lioke a bunch of Parentz saying goodbye to their childer overseas, Dese Rovah's will never see Planet Earf evah ageen!
UNLESS THEY ARE MELTED DOWN INTO A THRONE BE MARTIAN WARLORDS!
Spirit is Launched in an animation probably used for the ride, the Rocket doesn't go straight to Mars rather breaks up in shite in the air to launch da pod, an hope fer da besht!
7 months later and Nasa waits for word from Spirits Computah! Despite a Bumpy Landing, Spirit is online and taking pictures from the Red Planet.
Once Online, Spirits mission t'Gustav Crater, a Suspected Dried up lake is up and running, however all spirit finds iz igneous rocks, So Spirit is commanded is go to Columbia Mountains, a Journey that is 600 miles a journey Spirit will probably never make. On Da other side of Mars, Opera Tune Nitty has Literally landed on the other side of Mars and on a bedrock, one that containz "Geologic Truth" Stones that could only be formed be the presence of Water! Spirit is havin' worse luck, it's solar panels have being covered in dust and left it immobile , weeks later a chance wind cleans the panels and the rovah lives on! however machinery are not built to last forever, eventually both rovahs will break down an die!
With Water Confirmed, Phase 2 can start confirming if liofe existed on Marz, but that will never happen in our liofetime!
Doccer Mentries are reviewed differently dan filliums, while a movie iz meant t' entertain, a doccer mentrie is meant t' inform, this does the job, though yer have to laugh at da eggheadz when dey say tings like "Sedimentary Rocks Keep Me Awake At Night!)
(Eamonn woke in the brig of the airship, a Paladin opened the door with a palm print scan,
"MY LEADER WISHES TO SEE YOU" Said the distorted voice. Eamonn stood and looked at down, "Great, no Gae Dearg, no gun, no backup. Dahm!" He was lead into a room ordained with Propaganda Art, The Leader posed as a great protector of his Planet, one as a farmer tilling soil with his Followers, one more disturbing painting was him dressed a knight fighting a Hydra with the heads of the Religious leaders of the world's heads being severed by a sword that read "TRUTH". There Were many statues, too, of all those Leader defeated, the stone doppelgangers posed them begging for mercy! The Leader was with a Sculptor, Dressed as Eamonn in such a pose he turned his head slightly to see him
"Oh so you are Awake, Forgive me for dressing like you, But Since we are so Alike, I needed a new statue commissioned to celebrate my coming victory to take pride of place in my Hall of Heroic Fools!"
You know who can't win, I don't care if you are a me who couldn't cope and bears grudges! we a nothing alike!
WELL OF COURSE NOT! BECAUSE I AM NOT A FAILURE! YOU LIKE MANY OF THOSE WITH OUR CONDITION HAVE TRIED TO MAKE THOSE UNDERSTAND! THEY WILL NEVER UNDERSTAND WHAT IT IS LIKE TO AUTISTIC! NEVER! SO IF THEY CAN'T UNDERSTAND...I WILL MAKE THEM UNDERSTAND! I WILL THEM ALL KNOW THE COLOUR AND HOPE AND WONDER IS ALL BUT AN ILLUSION MADE BY THE OVERWHELMING, CRUSHING CRUELTY OF EXISTANCE, WE NOT MADE OF STARS! EAMONN, WE ARE NOTHING BUT PILES OF DUST!
(WHAT FOLLOWED WAS A HIGH PITCHED DERANGED GIGGLE, THAT DISTURBED EAMONN! WHAT WAS EVEN LOUDER! WAS THE ENGINES EXPLODING!)
REPORT!
"My Leader, we have being sabotaged by the Pimpernel"
(Meanwhile, Yusef and Joe-Jack Based jumped of the Airship onto a hillside, they looked up to see it explode. In front of them, a portal opened, out stepped 80's lad and Oracle, who hugged Yusef straight away, 80's Lad teleported away, leaving the portal open,
-and where is he goin'
-he has his own mission, something about a "being Plan A For a Change" so what happened?
-WE DID IT. OLD GIRL! We destroyed the Doomed Salvation!
-DOOMED SALVATION? WHAT'S DAT?
-THE NAME OF THE AIRSHIP!
-I THOUGHTZ DA AIRSHIP WAS CALLED DA TERROR?
-AND WHAT MADE YOU THINK THAT?
-FOR MONTHS YE WERE SAYING THAT WE MUST STOP DA TERROR FROM COMIN' TO EARF! WELL IF DAT WAS NOT DA TERROR? THEN WHAT IZ?
(IN THE WRECKAGE, LEADER BUSTED FROM BEING BURIED BY RUBBLE, HIS GAUNTLETS GLOWING AND SPINNING LIKE ZOETROPES AROUND HIS WRISTS, BY SOME FORTUNE, EAMONN LANDED ON A NOW DESTROYED SAFE THAT HEAD HIS OWN GAUNTLET!
FOOL! I WAS GOING TO SPARE YOU! I WAS GOING TO SEED MY SECOND EMPIRE AND LET YOU TEND TO A SECULAR PARADISE! INSTEAD I WILL RAZE YOUR MISBEGOTTEN PLANET LIKE THE WORTHLESS FIELD OF CHAFF IT IS!
.....TO BE CONTINUED ON THE 2ND OF MAY ON BOGGER BOX OFFICE! AND REMEMBER NO MATTER WHO MUCH LIFE GETS YOU DOWN, NO MATTER HOW MUCH YOU THINK THE WORLD CAN NEVER UNDERSTAND YOU FOR BEING YOU SOMETIMES MUCH LIKE THE FILM WORTHY ENOUGH TO BE SO SHIT TO BE A FINALE OF THIS SEASON, SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO...
ONLY ON BOGGER BOX OFFICE!
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