WOS WRESTLING: WEEK 5: HALFWAY SMART MARK!

Hey, you are reading the 390th post of this blog! that means the 400th post will be coming soon! next week, i will have my winter schedule, to reveal what i will be planning to do for that event!

But until then....Welcome back to Enlightened Towers' review of World of Sport Wrestling!

First Match was the 1st semi finals for the tag team belts, to be decided next week! As BT Gunn and Stevie Boy faced Iestyn Rees and Kip Sabian, in a beautifully paced, action packed, back and forth match. My Words can't do it justice, THERE MUST BE VIDEO OF IT ON YOUTUBE! Rees and Sabian took advantage of a miscue and finish was a Doomsday Device!

In A supposed 3-way, Crater looked on menacingly as Gabriel Kidd and Liam Slater put on a technical Masterclass.
BUT NEVER MIND THAT SHIT! LETS HAVE THE 400 POUND MAN BEAT THE CRUISERWEIGHTS INTO PASTE! WHO BOOKED THIS?

YEAH, RIGHT! IF VINCE BOOKED WOS, BEA PRIESTLY WOULD BE DRESSED AS A BUSHWHACKER, GET OUTTA HERE!

Second qualifier and Adam "GOBSHITE FROM LOVE ISLAND" Maxted and Nathan Cruz defeated Grado and Bulldog Jnr after Grado hurt himself after trying to leapfrog Cruz, Stu Bennett, who screwed grado out of the title picture for the last 4 weeks chimed in hilariously (" HE HAD 5 CHEESEBURGERS IN CATERING TODAY...FOR BREAKFAST!") Cruz directed traffic wanting Maxted to cheat, but in the end Cruz targeted Grado's ankle in a figure four, as Maxted checked on Grado post match. Wait, are they going to turn Maxted Face...because he is somewhat good looking and because some people already know who he is?...are they....NO! THEY ARE TURNING MAXTED INTO THEIR OWN JOHN CENA!


And finally the entire women's division (ALL 5 OF THEM! The champion Kay lee Ray, Viper, Kacey, Bea, Ayesha and Viper ) Competed in an over the top rope battle royal. Nice to see Kacey Owens the Bella...(whoops potential spoiler) i mean the Belle of Belfast make her debut along side Mae Young Finalist Ayesha! The match made everyone look strong, which is never a given in a match made out to eliminate people, The finish was Kaylee having a hard time with the 2 larger women, until viper decked Ayesha and Kay lee Capitalized by Superkicking Viper over the top to retain!

Next week
The tag tournament ends with a heel vs heel match. Kirby vs Hendry 3 as a submission only match! and Bulldog Jnr faces Rampage for The British Championship!

Double Feature: Transatlantic Panic: Wos week 4 and Summerslam 2018

Part 1
Wos week 4: Mad Maxted, Fury Chode
SATURDAY!
The Match between Kay Lee Ray and Bea Priestly ended in a DQ. Or would if the THE REF remembered how run ins work! Because of interference by Viper and Ayesha, all four will have a battle royal next week.

Ospreay and Kirby, match of the night! Fast paced and a main event anywhere in the world.

Grado and Bulldog Junior qualified for the last spot in the tag tournament, after Crater decimated his partner, Robbie X.

Finally, Justin Sysum defeated Joe Hendry and Nathan Cruz, who replaced Maxted, because Maxted is Shite! WE DON'T WANT MIZ 2.0 KILLING BRITISH WRESTLING BEFORE IT EVEN RESTARTED! Sysum is an unbelievable wrestler, he finished the match with a corkscrew dropkick!

ONE DAY LATER.....

PART 2-SUMMERSLAM 2018: SHOOKLYN

On the pre-show, last month Rusev was challenging for the wwe championship, now he's carrying his tapeworm of a wife to a loss against Almas and Zelina Vega!

Cedric Alexander retained the cruiserweight championship-Noone Cared, But I would Have! and B-team Retained against Revival, No-one Cared, but i would have! Also it was so important that Vince put the little men on the preshow, because as you will see, time was precious(!)

Also Joe told Renee, congratulations on being part of a "2 income relationship" again!


We are off to a good start on the main show, with IC champion Dolph Ziggler vs Seth Rollins. That Inverted Suplex into the Falcon Arrow, that will be every video for 2018 in wrestling Highlights til the end of time! Rollins is your new champion!

The Bludgeons attacked New day with...and nearly broke!....their papier mache Hammers for a DQ!

Braun bet Kevin Owens in a minute....Because Vince hates Fat men!

Charlotte bet Becky Lynch and Carmella to become the women's champion! Afterwards, Becky turned Heel on Charlotte...OR AT LEAST THAT WAS THE PLAN! Crowd wasn't to happy that Charlotte was added to this match that Becky worked so hard for! and boy howdy they popped when Becky clocked Charlotte!....VINCE IS GOING TO MAKE HER INTO THIS TO STOP PEOPLE CHEERING FOR HER, RIGHT?


The WWE Championship match was so slow and badly paced! and for added bad taste, Aj's wive and daughter were at ringside! Joe got disqualified after saying some shit to Aj's wife!

AND IT DIDN'T STOP THERE!
I had Miz Winning this match, but i was kid of hoping, with the emotion, with the bile, with 8 years of resentment....You would have done better than that! THIS WAS YOUR CHANCE TO PROVE ME WRONG ABOUT THE MIZ! YOU COULD HAVE HAD HIM WIN CLEANLY BY MAKING BRYAN TAP, BUT INSTEAD  MIZ WAS WANT HE ALWAYS IS, A CHEATING TALENTLESS BASTARD WHO CHEATS TO HIDE HIS LACK OF SKILL! YOU HAD THIS MATCH TO PROVE HE WAS AT EQUAL PEGGING TO BRYAN IN TERMS OF SKILL, AT THIS TIME AND WHAT DID YOU DO?

"YOU BLEW IT!"

The demon king Balor bet Baron Corbin in less than 2 minutes. Remember it was important that the tag belt and cruiserweight belts was on the pre-show, because who would wants to pay to see matches with short people?

Jeff hardy was so Focused when got his face kicked in by Nakamura!

Speaking of less that 3 minutes, that's how long it took Ronda Rousey to win her 1st gold in wwe! This brings out Nattie, who was wearing the ring coat her late father wore when he won the tag titles at the 1990 summerslam and her Bella Skanks, with the Rumour Nikki Bella-skank will face Ronda at Evolution

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=08i9kvCJvJ0

And Finally, after 3 years! Raw has a day to day champion! Blowman Lames is now universal champion. Braun came out to tease a cash-in, but Brock took Braun out and threw the case up the entrance ramp! The distraction means Roman is your Champion, but for how long?

Well that's it!
Next week on WOS, WE will have 2 tag team tournament semi-finals and a 4 way, over the top rope battle royal for the Women's championship!

See you next week!

Summerslam 2018 Predictions

In Memory of Jim "The Anvil" Neidhart, who died on Monday.

Due to reviewing Both World of Sport and Summerslam this weekend you can be able to find Summerslam 2018 results under the name "Transatlantic Panic!" On Monday.

ALL MATCHES ARE IN TITLE IMPORTANCE!

WWE CHAMPIONSHIP
SAMOA JOE VS AJ STYLES
So this Unbearable Heatwave made me sleep through raw but awake enough to watch smackdown, and I saw that "Wive's Letter" Promo that Joe Did! If comes to the fact that an actress posing as "Wendy Styles" comes out to help Joe, it would destroy the credibility of the only match that won't piss people off! and if they are hiring actresses that worked before with Aj Styles...

DON'T HIRE THIS WOMAN!
MONEY ON: JOE (CLEANLY OR NOT IS UP FOR DEBATE OR TASTE!)

WWE UNIVERSAL CHAMPIONSHIP
BORK LASER (C) VS BLOWMAN LAMES
OH, You want me to take this Seriously? I WILL TAKE THIS SERIOUSLY, WHENEVER RAW CREATIVE TAKES THIS SERIOUSLY! I HOPE THE CHANTS FOR " WE WANT BRAUN!" ARE SO LOUD, THAT THEY CANNOT BE EDITED!
MONEY ON: Reigns, only for Braun to cash in!

WWE RAW WOMEN'S CHAMPIONSHIP
ALEXA BLISS (C) VS RONDA ROUSEY
Given the events of the last few days, I doubt Nattie will turn up on Sunday. And if she does or Doesn't, Please respect her wishes for her mourn in her own way.
With that said, Nattie not being at ringside is not a real factor! This is a long time coming!
MONEY ON: ROUSEY

WWE SMACKDOWN WOMEN'S CHAMPIONSHIP
CARMELLA (C) VS BECKY LYNCH VS CHARLOTTE
THAT MOMENT WHEN YOU REALIZE CARMELLA HAS HOME STATE ADVANTAGE!

MONEY ON: CHARLOTTE TO TURN HEEL! PEOPLE WILL EXPECT BECKY TO TURN HEEL, BUT CHARLOTTE'S PERSONALITY AS A FACE IS AS FLAT AS HER ARSE IN THAT NUDE PHOTOSHOOT!

WWE INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPIONSHIP
DOLPH ZIGGLER (C) W/DREW MACINTYRE VS SETH ROLLINS W/DEAN AMBROSE!
I at least can expect a good match from this storyline. but I can't shake the feeling that Ambrose's new look means a heel turn!
MONEY ON: MY SMARKY SENSE IS TINGLING! AMBROSE TO TURN ON SETH, DOLPH RETAINS!

WWE UNITED STATES CHAMPIONSHIP
SHINSUKE NAKAMURA(C) VS JEFF HARDY
JUST REMEMBER HOW FOCUSED JEFF IS WHEN SHIN KICKS HIM IN THE FACE!
MONEY ON: SHIN, WITH HELP FROM ORTON!

THE "FUCK YOU FOR GETTING OVER MORE THAN OUR UNIVERSAL CHAMPION!" PRESHOW!
WWE RAW TEAM CHAMPIONSHIP,
WWE CRUISERWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP
MIXED TAG
I would go into more detail, but why would I? The subtitle says it all!

FINALS OF THE SMACKTEAM TAGDOWN TOURNEY
BLUDGEON BROTHERS (C) VS NEW DAY
One would have to assume that New day will win. The Bludgeons haven't really done ANYTHING as Champions. Last night the champions bet up Jobbers! JOBBERS!

MATCH FOR THE MITB BRIEFCASE
BRAUN STROWNMAN(RECIPIENT) VS KEVIN OWENS
IF BRAUN LOSES BY ANY MEANS, HE LOSES THE BRIEFCASE
...which means he will win outright, because only Dixie Carter would book a legit firing in a match!
But what if Kevin Owens does win? and cashes in later? THAT WOULD BE A BIGGER FUCK YOU TO SENILE VINCE, SINCE VINCE HAS BEING HARPING ON TO KEVIN OWENS TO LOSE WEIGHT, WHILE VINCE'S BITCH BOY CAN'T SLAM ANYONE WITHOUT GOING INTO SHOCK!
MONEY ON: AS TEMPTING AS TWISTING THE KNIFE INTO VINCE'S BOOKING WOULD BE, STROWMAN!

FINN BALOR VS BALDY COR-BLAND!


YEP!
MONEY ON: BALOR!

AND FINALLY
MIZ VS DANIEL BRYAN
This match will be emotional and personal, It will be to make up for the fact that it took a decade for miz to be...halfway decent!
MONEY ON: MIZ! THERE WILL BE A TEAM BRYAN VS TEAM MIZ AT SURVIVOR SERIES!

WELL THAT'S IT!

The Transantlantic Panic Event containing results from week 4 of WOS and Summerslam will be up sometime after 11am British Summer Time! Code Lyoko Series 2 reviews will start next Wednesday on boggerboxoffice.blogspot.ie

See you all next week!

PEACE!

WORLD OF SPORT WEEK 3: #FUCKTHEMETRONEWSPAPER

We open with the announcement that after being screwed out of the finish a fortnight ago, Justin Sysum will get a title shot on Rampage. we cut to Stu Bennett's office as former champion, Grado, pleads his case! Grado gets a match with Sha Samuels Provided he gets "SERIOUS"...And comes out with a suit and haircut that looks like Joseph Park has being put in a tumble dryer.

Grado beats Sha Samuels in a message to GM Bennett after discarding the suit to reveal the "real" Grado. what was funny about it was the entire finish was stem from a child putting the grado baseball cap back on Grado's head, either it was planned or the child doesn't like Grado!

Martin Kirby defeated Joe Hendry with a foot on the ropes. And before that the match was competitive and fun. Kirby made the mistake of getting on all fours and telling Hendry to Ride him (NO SNIGGERING IN THE BACK OF THE CLASS!) But Kirby was not made to look weak, since Hendry did not seem at times to have an answer for Kirby's more eccentric moves, like the Zoidberg Elbow or The Stop In The Name Of Love Enzirgiri!

Bt Gunn and Former ICW world champion Stevie Boy defeated CJ Banks and some Jobber! Seriously it was HG Drake last week, now it's Stevie Boy and this (reads notes) "Brad Slater" turning up? WHY EVEN HAVE ROSTER REVEALS ON TWITTER IF GUYS ARE JUST GONNA TURN UP!

I Must Apologize for last week's review when I said that Gabriel Kidd and Crater were going to have a Stretcher Match. It was a mistake due to the editing, one bugbear that has plagued the show since last week! I must add that i don't know if the editing has become less intrusive this week, or if i have come accustomed to it! Anyway Gabriel Kidd sold this beating from Crater like a trooper, who had to carted out on a stretcher, that's how you establish a Monster!

Finally, Despite being in matches and worse for wear, Sha Samuels and CJ Banks ensured a count out victory for their meal ticket, The British Champion, Rampage Brown!

Next week, another title defense for Rampage, Kay Lee Ray defends her Women's championship, the tag Tournament continues, and Will Ospreay takes on Martin Kirby, as Part of next week's DOUBLE FEATURE: TRANSATLANTIC PANIC As I review both WOSW AND Summerslam.

Now I'm off the newsagents to Get a few copies of The Metro! I need something to line the bottom of my birdcages! Until then,
PEACE! (UNLESS YOU ARE THAT CUCKWEASEL THAT COMPARED WWE PPVS TO BUYING PIZZA HUT WITH MONEY OFF VOUCHERS! WE GET IT WRESTLING IS LIKED BY MORE WORKING CLASS PEOPLE! I DON'T SEE ANY METRO REPORTERS GETTING IN THE RING TO DEFEND THEIR CASE, THE MIDDLE ENGLISH TWATS!)

Follow me on Twitter @RealEnli

WORLD OF SPORT WRESTLING WEEK 2: THOSE DAMN CENSORS!

I am behind the 8th ball this week because of the dreaded bank holiday, So this will be brief!

We open with General Manager Stu Bennett gloating over Rampage's title win last week, he gives The Rampage Gang permission to have a Title Celebration...which gets interrupted by Joe Hendry. Hendry Demands that he has a match with the new champion right now and Bennett tells the timekeeper to ring the Bell.

Rampage Brown retains the WOSW British Championship due to outside interference by CJ Banks. Woiuld have made more sense if it was Martin Kirby who screwed Hendry, since Kirby screwed Hendry last week!

Next was the 4-way ladder match for a briefcase containing an "Opportunity" for a match next week. And Jesus H Christ, was this match edited to oblivion! ok, It's one during the day, but you can't have a don't try this at home message and cutaway to a reaction shot instead of showing spots! Anyway Gabriel Kidd wins....by not really doing anything! so he gets the opportunity next week, which was revealed in the closing segment!

Nathan Cruz and Adam "GOBSHITE FROM LOVE ISLAND!" Maxted defeated Doug Williams and H.G. Drake. Drake didn't have a roster reveal on Wos' Twitter account so i didn't talk about him on my roster reveal post a month back so I will now. From the very little I saw Of him in 5star wrestling, i was very impressed. Anyway The Heels won...with the crap wrestler doing the heavy work and the talented wrestler getting a cheap pin? WHAT NEW SPORE OF MADNESS IS THIS?

So Maxted qualifies for the tag title tournament? I hope the belt makers have replaced the Velcro with Gorilla Tape, that way Maxted won't lose this belt if he becomes champion and yes that my once per show!

Finally History was made with the crowning of the new Women's Champion....and that too was Edited to Oblivion, even with Kay Lee Ray,  and Bea Priestley wearing less provocative ring gear, there is only so much change you can put without compromising the gimmick and moveset, Bea wore these garters that made it look like she was wearing shorts and Kaylee wore her face gear (trousers instead of shorts, no leathers!) and Viper still wore her leotard and Fishnets and the camera kept cutting away everytime they showed a reverse shot of Viper! Anyway Kaylee Ray is your inaugural women's champion after lifting the 200 plus pound  Viper and hitting a Gory Bomb!

Next week on WOS wrestling, Hendry and Kirby settle their feud, The Opportunity that Gabriel Kidd won is a Stretcher Match against the 400 pounder, Crater. Will he survive?, a new Qualifier for the tag tourney and who will challenge Rampage next for the British Championship?